Tradition of Bidai.


Till now I was missing my bro , I was sheding tears thinking about him and the memories I had with him.
Things were getting normal, I was recovering from the loss and was  trying to manage without him.
Suddenly my phone range one afternoon and my younger bro told me Dad is not moving , he is not breathing , there is no pulse, I collapsed.

My life was shattered again. My dad is my Hero, I dont know how to not to miss him.
Every day I miss him, I miss him calling me atleast thrice a day just to check if i was alright.
I miss his possivness that he had for me. His caring and his guidance.
I fought with him so much but he never got upset with it I dont know how he managed that.

I was just thinking how can he get a cardiac arrest when things were so normal.

I think there was a lot which was unsaid between us.
He was missing me but he didnt reveal it. It would have made me uneasy to adjust in my new house.
Why will he not miss me , His routine started with waking me and to ensure I have a smooth life.
Calling me during the day to check how is my day , Am I ok , have I reached home or am I getting late.
My studies, my competitions, my work , my hobbies he was a part of every little thing.
Our discussions on Politics , movies,music , why will he not miss me .
Our fights on watching BigBoss and he insisting on watching Maharana Pratap.
He must be missing all this when I was away from him in my Sasural.

Diwali shopping what ever it might be new clothes, crackers,sweets without fail he got for us.
He never shopped for himself. He never had a luxurious life for him but he ensured we get the best. He ensured Mom is secured even if he is not there. Today my mom doesn't have to worry in financial terms but nothing can replace him.

This tradition of letting daughters go after marriage somewhere gives a strong pinch to our parents. Speacially DAD's . They are really not prepared to let their daughters go. A person who never allowed his daughter for late nights, over night parties, Long weekend stays how can he adjust his daughter gone completely away from him.

No dad will ever reveal this how much they miss their daughters. How much worried they are even after ensuring that the daughter is in safe hands.

My request to all DAD's
Dont love your daughter so much, she has to go one day and you have to move on then.

I wanted you Dad to see how happy I am and all good thigns which will come across in life ahead.

I know how much you loved me , how much you cared for me. Trust me I miss u and I was always worried for you. But we daughters are molded that way , to be strong, adjust anywhere we go.

I will always make you feel proud of me.

Guide me Bless me.



Sush

I am a abnormal girl
I like to go out in sun,
I like to go out in rain,

I like the fresh air
Places I go nature I see
I enjoy it my way,
I see the sunrise and the sunset soothes me
The beaches call me,
The shore follows me,
I like the sun
I like the rains, 
I dream for sparking bright future

I see dreams big then bigger,

Happiness is my way
Peace is not found anywhere,
I regain, reframe, rejoin and rejoice
I am a abnormal girl,
I am in every girl...


Cheers,
SUSH

And  I am Married....

After searching, hunting , verifying many candidates I mean marriage proposals finally I found my life partner.
I think the search of this for my parents was more difficult then me to say yes . But yes finally my parents found one. With initial family meetings and telephonic conversations we got engaged . We hadn't been on any date till then. After getting officially engaged it was time for our first date. It was an amazing one. Simple and easy going. Conversations at its best. Walk on the beach and ice gola and visits to 5 temples. It was memorable. Returning home I had this sense of assurance of getting engaged to the right person.Time passed and our wedding was around the corner. 
Getting married is not easy . The shopping never ends. The preparations are on going even after the marriage I think. The wedding day OMG what a day it was full of roller costar ride. You are not sure even for minute as how are you feeling or what exactly are you feeling. 
There is a super magnifying tension going in your mind and that is you are not returning to your home after the ceremony. You are at a brand new place with all new people. Complete blank ness.
But I must say families and relatives support you the best at these moments. 
I was lucky enough . I was surrounded with all best people in the family. Most of my tension was getting released step by step. 
I learned few things during this phase
You have to be strong enough to leave your family and move on
You have to communicate no matter how quite you are.
Learn to adjust
Be ready to change your food culture
The most important you should have the best Husband who helps you in learning all this.

New life begins. Whatever you have learnt gets refurbished. New culture , new people and your routine habits , everything changes. 
During this period I realized I was confused my new home doesn't seems to be my home and my actual home also seems to be different . It takes time to understand where you belong too.

Time is the best medicine for everything and it is true. Gradually I have learnt both are my houses and  I have to manage both of it without troubling anybody.

I am lucky and thank full to GOD for giving me this family and this wonderful husband.


Cheers !!!

Mrs. SUSH